Why is it so hard for me to forgive and forget?

When someone does something that hurts us it can trigger older, deeper pains. Without realising it we can engage in the ‘snowball affect’. We unconsciously layer the new hurt to the old hurt, until we are facing something too big and overwhelming to forgive and forget.

What does the Bible say about forgetting and forgiving?

The Bible teaches us much about forgiveness, and all of it is the opposite of “forgive and forget.” In Matthew 6:14-15, “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

What are some things you don’t trust about forgiveness?

8) You don’t trust that if you forgive someone they will forgive you back. Forgiveness is not a guaranteed two-way street. Often, by letting go of something, we do naturally affect others around us, but sometimes it doesn’t work that way.

Why is it so difficult to forgive someone?

Here are some misconceptions we have about forgiveness that often make it difficult for us to forgive someone: We think forgiveness is excusing a person or letting them off the hook. To forgive someone who has hurt you doesn’t mean you’re letting that person off the hook. It doesn’t mean you’re excusing that person for their offenses.

What to do when you have a hard time forgiving someone?

So if you’re having a hard time forgiving someone, don’t berate yourself about it. Ask yourself which condition hasn’t been met yet. If you’re missing an apology, still suffering the consequences of the injury, or if the behavior has been repeated, let yourself off the hook. Forgive yourself for not forgiving.

Does forgiving others make you look weaker?

We may feel as if forgiving others makes us look weak, that we are letting the person who hurt us off the hook, that they should also suffer and be humiliated. We tell ourselves that strong people don’t forgive those who hurt or offend them. “You got me once, but never again.”